Since I am sharing my journey through this career pivot pretty much in real-time, I figured I’d do it all the way. As mentioned in the latest Weekly Reads, last week I’ve hit a bit of an energetic low when it comes to pushing forward and definitely experienced more negative thoughts than positive ones running through my head as I kept contemplating the change. So, I thought why not also share this in real-time as I am navigating through it. Maybe it’s helpful/relatable for some, maybe it’s not.
Some of the thoughts that have been running through my head have been:
- Not feeling good enough – This one has been an ongoing battle of mine for as long as I can remember and in different areas of my life. As a high performer though, I’ve built a solid track record of succeeding in many different environments to prove myself the opposite. I guess the “insecure overachiever” mentality is definitely still living somewhere inside of me and “comes out to play” every now and then.
- Straight on fear that I will not be able to perform once I secured a new role – Again, linked to the above, I experienced some of this unreasonable fear that is very much contradicting my past experiences. It was a bit scary to be honest because I don’t think I’ve ever felt it so strongly, but it was definitely there for a moment. I wonder, is it a coincidence that these thoughts run through my head right before sleep?
I think it’s normal not to always be on the high and probably it’s also a result of overthinking this move, but I wanted to make sure I acknowledge this, and that self-doubt thoughts and straight-on fear also haunt me from time to time. Since I am sharing my career journey in real-time with you all, I want to be transparent and share the good but also the bad.
Pursuing a different role brings a whole new learning curve, but yours truly is not sitting and waiting. I am still here and I keep on preparing myself as much as I can (if there is one thing I have is persistence and especially when it comes to learning and doing), pulling a few strings here and there (namely, doing some internal product-focused networking and informal interview) and just giving myself the space to learn, grow and have faith in myself (or at least trying to ). Point is, it’s completely normal to feel self-doubt, just don’t let it stop you.
I am happy to also have started this week on a stronger note. I’ve just come off leading a very good meeting with – guess who – our Product and UX/Design teams and this definitely pumped me up. Talk about not being defined by our work.
Thanks for tuning in and see you soon in our next career adventure episode! Do let me know in the comments if you have similar stories to share, would love to hear from you!